Love Addiction

One form of addiction that may or may not include sexual ‘acting out’ behaviour is known as love addiction. Love addiction involves becoming excessively preoccupied with a spouse or partner to the point that every aspect of the love addict’s life becomes less important than his/her spouse or partner.

Love addicts are typically emotionally insecure and they project all their hopes and dreams for their future onto the other person and the relationship. Someone who is emotionally secure realizes that one person cannot be totally responsible for another’s happiness but love addicts are unable to comprehend this concept and pin all their hopes for happiness onto their spouse or partner.

Some love addicts do use sex as a way to hold on to their spouse or partner. They often feel unlovable if the relationship does not include sex, and worry about losing their spouse or partner if lovemaking grows stale. The self-esteem of love addicts is often be linked to their sexual desirability (or at least their perception of it) and thus when their spouse or partner is not sexually responsive, the love addict feels rejected and of less worth.

Like many addictions, the seeds of love addiction are often sown in one’s childhood. A lack of parental attachment, emotional neglect, abuse and dysfunctional family relationships can all cause an “attachment hunger” which manifest itself in later life – and especially in one’s relationships.